Thursday, January 24, 2008

Snabulus Forces News Media to Carry Asteroid Story

Well, not really but it made a cool headline. Alicia Chang at Associated Press finally asked for NASA's opinion of Asteroid TU24 and they said:

An actual collision of a similar-sized object with Earth occurs

Just kidding, that was taken slightly out of context. What they really said was:

An asteroid at least 500 feet long will make a rare close pass by Earth next week, but there is no chance of an impact, scientists reported Thursday.

The object, known as 2007 TU24, is expected to whiz by Earth on Tuesday with its closest approach at 334,000 miles, or about 1.4 times the distance of Earth to the moon.

The nighttime encounter should be bright enough for medium-sized telescopes to get a glimpse, said Don Yeomans, manager of the Near-Earth Object Program Office at NASA's Jet Propulsion Laboratory, which tracks potentially dangerous space rocks.

However, next week's asteroid pass "has no chance of hitting, or affecting, Earth," Yeomans said.

Great. Now what am I supposed to do with 25,000 packets of dried potatoes and 110,000 AK-47 rounds? I know a guy at Kellogg, Brown, and Root who can probably liquidate this stuff for me. What possible harm could come from that?

Anyhoo, back to thinking about restarting my bike commute in a slightly less demanding way.

Have fun!


Dave said...

Better luck next time!

Overdroid said...

You'll need that stuff for after the Oil Crash.

ladybug said...

I'll do my best w/the dried potatoes dear, but as for the ammo...perhaps you can melt it down for an interesting art installation in the back yard?

You can borrow your dad's forge...

Pandabonium said...

"Now what am I supposed to do with 25,000 packets of dried potatoes and 110,000 AK-47 rounds?"

Make a "starch & gunpowder rocket" powered bike.

Gertrude: What the hell was that? It went by so fast I couldn't see it.

Heathcliff: Does McDonald's deliver now? It smelled like French fries.

Dean Wormer said...

You got 'em to pull their heads out of their asteroids.

Good job, Snab!

The Moody Minstrel said...

Weren't you living on MREs for a while? Some habits die hard, I guess. ;-)

Don Snabulus said...

Mmm, nothing like surplus MREs to brick up the old pipes.